19 things from Spring Training

Every year the Grapefruit and Cactus leagues provide us with legendary tales of balls hit distances the naked eye can’t accurately measure, of fastballs so fast you’d think the radar gun was artificially amped up, of batting averages so high it’s like all the pitchers faced were dewy eyed fastball throwing college kids.

It’s where ‘org guys’ briefly appear in ESPN headlines, it’s where we decide rookies will definitely make a major league impact this year and it’s where we worry about Roy Halladay’s fastball velocity.

But what else has Spring Training 2013 revealed?

  1. John Lackey got thinner and thus became the early frontrunner for the Cy Young
  2. Alfredo Aceves throws an eephus pitch better than a punch
  3. Kansas City are the best team in the National League
  4. Don Orsillo and Jerry Remy should be replaced by Jenny Dell and Heidi Watney
  5. TV broadcasters continue to believe that Spring Training counts for something
  6. Opponents in my Fantasy league think Tommy Milone for Kris Medlen is fair deal
  7. Don Orsillo wears moccasins while working out
  8. The Baltimore Orioles are the best team in the American League
  9. Manny thought he was ordering Taiwanese rhino horn online…
  10. The Yankees are the worst team in the American League
  11. Blue Jays fans don’t believe John Farrell was ‘traded’, eh
  12. Carl Crawford hates Boston because he played poorly for millions of dollars
  13. Terry Francona doesn’t get Tom Werner
  14. Mike Trout is not a size zero
  15. The only thing Johnny Damon is signed up for in 2013 is MLB.tv
  16. Another year and Bobby Valentine is still advertising Fantasy baseball
  17. Curt Schilling apparently has more bloody socks than Rhode Island creditors
  18. Nothing.
  19. In March people will read anything remotely baseball related
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